Six Months and Still Hurting

My heart is heavy today for a family that I am not very close to, except that I know their son.  The Bennett family are members at Germantown Baptist (but I believe they attend Crossroads) and Blake, their son, has been in our home for DNOW.  Dave Bennett passed away from ALS or commonly known as Lou Gehrig’s disease, on Monday.  Blake is 17.  Dave’s funeral is tomorrow at GBC.

There is a common link between our families.  My father died of ALS and I was also 17.  Blake thinks the world of his dad, as it should be.  I wasn’t as close to my father as most young girls should be at that age.  I was busy trying to grow up, be a cheerleader, keep my schedule at church, and social calendar all in check.  My sisters were both out of the house by the time dad got to the point he needed assistance.  You can imagine bathing, eating, walking, moving from one chair to the other, and many other things.  I do have to say that my last memories of my father were always seeing his Living Bible on the kitchen table with the devotion book Streams in the Desert.  That wasn’t the life my dad always lived, but at least it’s what he lived the last two years.

I am not sure how long Dave was sick, but I know it was not as long as my dad.  My dad had ALS for six years.  It was very uncommon to have ALS for that period of time.  I know what got me through those days as a teenager was spending my time with my friends.  It was a distraction from reality.

I am finding that I still wish I had a distraction from reality.  It seems like yesterday, but on Saturday we celebrated 6 months since Trey’s passing.  I know Blake will feel that too.  All I can hold on to is that I know God is our sustainer and our redeemer.  I pray He redeems me from these feelings of sorrow that will not go away.  I have feelings that others expect to be gone, but for me, they are still fresh on my mind, and YES, on my shoulders.  Who knows when God will ease the pain.  I did get some joy knowing that the “Communities Rally Around Trey Erwin” was voted #1 story for 2012 for Channel 5/WMC.  That just shows how God spoke through Trey so much.

I pray the sorrow and pain is lifted from the Bennett family and that God grants them peace that only He can give.  We only had four months with Trey when we found out about his cancer.  Only four precious months.  We are not promised tomorrow.  It says in Mark 13:31-33 “Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will not pass away. 32 But of that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone. 33Take heed, keep on the alert; for you do not know when the appointed time will come.”

I am also reminded in Colossians 3:23-24 it tells us that “Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance.  It is the Lord Christ whom you serve.”  THAT is what we need to remember.  THAT is what Trey did.  THAT is what I need to be doing, even though my days are long and tiring.  Jay’s seem much longer.  We can’t care what men will think, we must serve the Lord so on that day He will be able to say to us, WELL DONE.  I know He told my boy Well Done, as well as Dave Bennett.  It’s hard to imagine that the suffering on this earth is merely for a short time, but our time with God will be for eternity.

Dave’s favorite quote – “Life is precious – Nothing is forever”

I’m ready for eternity! Are you?


5 thoughts on “Six Months and Still Hurting

  1. That’s such a wonderful quote! Jason’s death taught me both of those things. I believe, on some level, before Jason died I thought we would go on forever or I would outlive him:`(

  2. Loss is so hard and it can come in many forms. I have not experienced the permanent loss of our son but several temporary losses. Our son has lyme disease and with it has come several losses in his mind. Everytime this has happened, we experience an emotional loss of who he is. Our emotions have to say “goodbye for now and we are here for you and will be here when you . find your mind again. It sounds horrible and it is. His mind gets confused and twisted and we have to start trying this and that and in the meantime hoping and praying with all our might that he returns back to the person we know. Our daughter does what you did Lisa to keep a grip hangs on tight to all her girlfriends and stays real busy but most of all tries to treat Wilson normally. I’m saying all this to confirm the fact that without God in our lives this would be plain and simply undoable. Just like with you and the loss of Trey have put all your faith and trust in a God that knows what is best for all of His creations and does give us what we need to hang on and never give up. Thank you for sharing your hurts and your honesty in your feelings. I can only imagine how hard it must be to not have the earthly presence of your precious son, Trey.

  3. Lisa, I am so sorry that your pain will not ease. I cannot imagine losing a child…..I am sure that the pain from that lasts much, much longer than the death of any other loved one. You carried him in your womb, he is part of you. I believe THAT is why. I keep up with your blog and I still pray for you, Jay, Collin and Julianne. I can’t imagine some people thinking your pain should be gone by now. It hasn’t even been ONE YEAR yet. I hope and pray for all of your sakes that it has eased SOME by then, but I know it will never be completely gone. I know it wouldn’t for me anyway. I wish I could give you a great big hug, so I will give you a cyber one ((((((HUG)))))).

  4. Can’t imagine anyone would be surprised to know that it’s six months and you are still hurting. I’ve heard t said you never get over losing a child. Like losing a limb, you heal, but you are never the same. Grace to you, prayers for you and your precious family.

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